Once upon a time of feeling alone

After few times worked so hard ( I think..), travelling many places, had no time for myself by trying to kill my own time, diving in a dozen of tasks in the office.. hope that I can forget everything that has bothered me, some great memories of my history.

 

I just found that we cannot be a 'human' just by focusing on one thing only.. we still have religion to trust, family to take care, friends to hang out, and even soulmate to travel the live..

 

And right now, I'm stuck in the same place I often write blog, Starbucks thamrin. Contemplating, expressing, and writing.. Try to hide from the world, express my mind into words.. Words that stored in hidden website, with not so many people read, maybe just you and me..

 

I'm listening a jazz music, instrumental, hmm.. quite chilling me out. Suddenly I remember the novel by Seno Gumira Aji Dharma, "Jazz, Parfum dan Skandal".. The atmospher here is quite similar.. I can sense the loneliness here, mix with jazz music in the coffee shop. At the background, I hear people chatting about everything.. But, in the middle of this crowd, I can hear the silence tell me that she's still exist. Just waiting for her turn. And slowly, I'm killed by the silence..

 

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Slank - Terbunuh Sepi

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Gerimis di tengah malam ..

Ditempat sedingin ini .. aku sendiri ..

Dan tak ada ..tempat mengadu ..

Dan bibir untuk kucium..sepi membunuhku ..

Kuterlepas tak terkendali ..

Dan aku tenggelam .. semakin dalam ..

Oh tak ada .. tempat berteduh

Dan tubuh untuk kupeluk.. sepi membunuhku

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Hey, have you ever thought, how many people meet at the first time on this coffee shop? Maybe they met here... got to know each other here.. and suddenly good thing happened..

 

Actually, what do you want to do in this life? Just playing around? Or working so hard? And suddenly your time has passed away? Or you may have a GREAT life.. not just a good one. A great life is not taken for granted, right? You have to fulfil it with so many good and also, offcourse, sometimes bad things.

 

How old will you be when you pass away? 20, 40, 60, 80, or even 100 years? You'll never know, but even you get 100, you will not even miss one chance of living when you only got 100 years to live..

 

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Five for fighting : 100 Years

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............
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

 

...............
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Back to the topic, have you got any plan for yourself? How about your family? Your future children? Grandchildren? Have you seen any exact clear picture of your future.. what do you really want to be happened? Or maybe you have no picture at all? Well, just don't let your fear makes you afraid to draw the dreams.. Just like my friend said: don't let the fear of striking out puts you out of the game..

 

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Kemenangan hari ini...

Bukanlah berarti kemenangan esok hari

Kegagalan hari ini...

Bukanlah kegagalan esok hari

Tak ada yang jatuh dari langit

Dengan cuma-cuma

Semua usaha dan do'a

Kebenaran hari ini

Bukanlah berarti

kebenaran saat nanti

Kebenaran bukanlah kenyataan

Hidup adalah perjuangan

Tanpa henti-henti

usah kau...

menangisi hari kemarin

Hidup adalah perjuangan

Bukanlah arah dan tujuan

Hidup adalah perjalanan

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Dewa : Hidup Adalah Perjoeangan

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Well, just grab your stick and start the game, hit your home run, don't you??

 

This is just my contemplation.. an hour of thinking.

Keeping the gear oiled.. Just to remind that my mind and soul are alive.. Standing here alone but not lonely..

 

Ciao..

 

Starbucks Thamrin, 20 Dec 2005 11:22 WIB